Five Walls at Sea: Lasts

These past few weeks have been full of lasts. The last day of surgery. The last day of the hospital. The last day for day workers. The last day of school. Our last trip to the orphanage. The last bag of milk given to Alseny. We have only one week left here in Guinea. It is a week full of pack up and securing, getting ready for our five day sail to Canary Islands. Our work here in Conakry is essentially over. It is time to move on. In many ways we are so ready. We are tired. We are ready to see family and friends. We are ready for change. But in other ways we are sad as we see our first field service with Mercy Ships ending.

As we said goodbye to our wonderful Day Workers last Friday I found myself much more emotional than I anticipated. I asked a few of them what they were going to do now that they no longer had a job with us. None of them knew. They seemed a bit down and one of them started crying as she hugged me and thanked me for the opportunity to have this job (not that I personally had anything to do with it). I felt saddened for them and helpless to do anything about their current unemployment. I started to wonder if we’ve really made a difference here or if we just came in for a few months and did some surgeries and we are leaving without really making lasting change.

A few other things added to my discouragement. I learned that some of our teaching of local doctors was not as advanced as we had hoped. They needed much more basic and elementary training than the grand plans that we had. They were in more need of teaching about basic operating room procedures than about training in specific surgeries or advanced anesthesia. I heard from some that they didn’t think Guinea was in a better place than when we came. There has been some violence in this city surrounding elections and this violence has become much more intense and much more of an ethnic issue since we got here. Some see this increase in violence as a sign that Guinea is worse now than when we came.

As I was feeling sad and discouraged I felt like God shook me free and reminded me of who He is. I felt like he was saying to me, “How can you love people, show them my son Jesus, provide jobs, make friends, heal bodies and NOT think that I have worked in amazing ways to show Myself to these people through you?” I realized how prideful it was to think that WE haven’t done enough here. Yes, the Lord USES us but ultimately it is HIM who is working in people’s hearts and making lasting changes. We can come up with all the measures of success that we want but ultimately it is God’s job to show his power and to change lives. Thousands of patients have been healed. Those people would not argue that Mercy Ships has made a difference in their lives. Patients and day workers have expressed that they have felt loved and accepted like never before. God was working daily in this place. Guineans from the clashing tribes were working alongside each other on this ship, something that never happened (according to some) in this way before we came.

We can only see the tiny tip of the iceberg of change that the Lord has brought. Day workers want to go back to their local hospitals and change the way things are done. Teaching and capacity building is happening. People have seen the love of Jesus. Lives have been changed. I no longer feel discouragement. I feel so excited for all that the Lord has done and I am excited to watch as Guinea continues to grow and change. This country isn’t perfect, nor will it ever be, but it is ignorant and blind to say that things are not different. Our God is so much greater than ethnic differences. He is greater than poverty. He is greater than physical limitations or disabilities. He does not call us to change countries. He calls us to love people. And I feel that we have done that. I believe that we MUST trust that He is able to take all that we have done, all our tiny and great efforts of love, and turn them into miraculous displays of his glory. We have to trust that or else we are just relying on our own limited human view of change. I trust that he has done this. Guinea is better off because of God’s work in this place. My wise friend Dianna said, “We didn’t bring God here, nor are we taking him with us. God has always been here in Guinea and he will continue to be here when we leave.” Mercy Ships leaving this place is not the end of God’s work. Our time here was just a tiny surge of love in the midst of an eternity of His perfect work.

I pray that the people of this country will turn their hearts to Jesus. I pray that the violence in this country would stop. I pray that this country, so full of potential and resources, would get out of their own way and become all that they can be. God is working. He loves these people and He will continue to love them for all time. I am thankful for the opportunity to have been here and witnessed the work of Mercy Ships but I am even more grateful for an all-powerful God that is so much bigger than anything we could hope to do on our own. In the midst of all these lasts I am blessed to serve a God who's love truly lasts.